Cheeseburgers

O: "Mom, can we get cheeseburgers for dinner?"

M: "No, not tonight."

Odan fumes in the backseat, and makes angry sounds for a few minutes.

M: "Odan, what's wrong?"

O: "You're making me mad! I asked and you didn't understand!"

In Line at Costco

Waiting for the cashier to start checking our items...

O: "Excuse me! You have another customer! And it's my mom!"

I Am Following You

Odan tip-toes sneakily behind his daddy when he is supposed to be in his room (it's bedtime) when he says in a playful way:

O: "I am following you.....I am really not your small enemy."

Real Santa

The kids saw Santa at Wal-Mart and got a picture. Then we had a Santa at a ward Christmas party. The next day....

Odan looking at the picture of Santa from Wal-Mart,

O: "That's not the real Santa. The real Santa was at the fake Stake Center Christmas party."

A Star

O: "Mom! I see a star! It's so beautiful! I want to marry a star because it's beautiful."

In a Movie

O: "Are we in a movie?"

M: "What?"

O: "Is the world sometimes in a movie?"

M: "What do you think?"

O: "I think yes. But maybe no. Or yes."

Friends

M: "Odan, when you are in school, you'll have friends to have playdates with."

O: "I already have friends!"

K: "No, you'll get new friends!"

How does our hair stay?

O: "How does our hair stay? Are there tiny people up there growing plants?"

Breaking Toys

I put Odan in his room for not listening to me.

O: "You made me angry mom!"

There is silence, I walk away and am in the next room when I hear the sound of a toy car being banged against the door.

O: "I'm going to break this toy!"

D: "Mom! He's going to break the toy!"

Me shouting from the next room....
M: "Odan, if you are going to break toys, maybe that means you don't need any new toys for Christmas. I'm not going to get you toys if you are just going to break them."

5 second pause.

O: "Mom, I changed my attitude."

D: "Are you mad?"

O: "No, I changed my attitude."

Mean Eyes

O: "Is your dog going to bite me?"

A: "No, he just tickles you." (dog licks him)

O: "That doesn't tickle. Is your dog nice?"

A: "Yes."

O: "Then how come he has mean eyes?"

(Told to me by my friend, I hope I got it right, I had to paraphrase)

What is that?

O: "DeeAnn, is that poop on your face?"

D: "No!"

O: "Well then what is it?"

D: "It's peanut butter."

O: "No, because peanut butter isn't brown, and I know the color brown, so it's poop."

(It was chocolate by the way)

What Do You Want to Say?

Odan stalling before going to bed...

M: "What do you want to say?"

O: "Um....I'm thinking. That was the deal."

Smart

D: "Odan, I love you for a million reasons. You are smart, loving, funny--"

Odan interrupts,

O: "I'm not that smart!"

Turning into the Hulk

M: "Careful! If you get angry while wearing this Hulk shirt, you'll turn into the Hulk."

K: "Do it Odan!"

M: "Yeah, try it, change into the Hulk, go ahead!" (enthusiastically)

Odan very somber and seriously,

O: "I don't want to change into the Hulk. I don't want to beat you up!"

Girlfriend

O: "Mom, my girlfriend is moving to another state." (sadly)

M: "Who is your girlfriend?"

O: "Um, Eliza and Mekensey. But just Mekensey is moving."

Beautifullest Friend

(Upon seeing my current facebook cover photo)
O: "There's mommy, and Uncle Ozzie, and the girl I'm going to marry, and Uncle Issac!"

M: "You're going to marry Cat?"

O: "Yes, she is my most beautifullest friend."

I Just Want to Kiss You!

This is one that Odan says every day, multiple times a day. Mostly when I am busy doing dishes, meals, chores, etc. and he comes and smothers my legs or jumps on my back if I am within reach. When I attempt to pry him off, or turn him away he says,

"But mom! I just want to kiss your cheek!"

Crazy

O: "Mom, I'm crazy!"

(Pause)

O: "Does crazy mean you go to jail?"

The Couch

M: "Odan!!!" (in a reprimanding tone, as he was climbing the arm of the couch and 'falling' onto it)

O: "But mom...the couch saved my life!"

Ariel

O: "Is Ariel in real life?"

M: "No"

O: "Aw. I wish."

M: "Why?"

O: "Because she is so beautiful."

Testimony Meeting

Yesterday during fast and testimony meeting, a rather animated and passionate member of our ward (love him) asked everyone this rhetorical question:

R: "How many of you feel worthy to stand in the presence of God?"

Slight pause of silence, then Odan responds loudly,

O: "I DO!"

Baby Kyah

O: "Is baby Kyah in jail?"

M: "No!"

O: "Then who broke the light?"

Marry a Prince

O: "Mom, Jen needs to marry a prince."

M: "Why?"

O: "Because she's a princess."

M: "But Odan, she's already married."

O: "Yep. To a prince."

Election

Watching election coverage...

M: "What are they talking about Odan?"

O: "The United States of America mom!"

Primary

In primary....

O: "Did you're mom make you brown?" (to his friend)

Teacher: (answering for the friend) "No, his mom didn't, his dad did."

O: "Is he going to get it off?"

Teacher: "No, he gets to stay like that."

O: "Oh." (goes back to his own business)

Tights

O: "DeeAnn, how did you get your legs and feet black? Did you paint them?"

D: "Ya."

M: "No, Odan, they're tights."

D: "Ya, I painted my tights."

Yellow Fire Truck

M: "Look! A yellow fire truck!"

O: "I think Fresh Market is on fire."

M: "No, it's not."

Quietly to himself...

O: "I think it's an invisible fire."

I Will Never Tell You

Driving in the car...

O: "Mom, I'm thinking about something, but I'm not going to tell you."

M: "Okay, you don't have to."

(then my curiosity gets the better of me)

M: "Odan, tell me what you're thinking about."

O: "No."

M: "Aw come on!"

O: "Never!"

M: "Odan! Just tell me!"

O: "No mom. I will never tell you what I am thinking about."

M: "Okay, okay. Will you tell Daddy?"

O: "No! I won't tell Daddy either! I will never tell anyone!"

An Old Man

O: "Hey Mom, I saw an old, old, old, old, old, old, old, old, old man. And he was grumpy! But not to me. Just to himself!"

Where Do You Get Your Jokes?

R: "Hey Odan, where do you get your jokes?"

O: "Um...at the DI."

What Do You Want For Christmas?

M: "So kids, what do you all want for Christmas this year?"

K: "A remote-control car."

D: "Brave." (what she calls Merida)

O: "Umm.....A Jean Valjean toy."

Yeah.  :)  "Les Mis" much?

I Forgot

O: "Mom, I love you and thank you for (mumbling something inaudible)"

M: "What? Thank you for.....what did you say?"

O: "Um...I forgot what I said."

Glowing Spider

O: "I want to get bit by a glowing spider! So I can stick on walls!"

The Death of Dinosaurs

O: "Mom, how did dinosaurs die?"

M: "Nobody knows."

O: "Well, Fantasia knows, it's because of earthquakes."

Toxic

M: "Whew, Odan, when did your farts become so toxic?"

O: "Mom, my farts don't talk!"

Sunday Morning

Odan crawled into bed with me as I was lazily waking up. He managed to get under the covers and says to me,

O: "Mom! I love you and that's final!"

(then pulls the covers over his head completely to hide from me)

:)

Tells the Truth

(Conversation between Odan and DeeAnn)

O: "Are you mad?"

D: "Ya!"

O: "Well, Jesus loves you. Do you love Jesus?"

D: "No."

O: "But Jesus tells the truth."

Baby

O: "Mom! Mom!" (yelling while we were walking up to King's school)

M: "What Odan?"

O: "I saw a brown baby!" (excitedly)

M: "Oh really? Was it a cute baby?"

O: "Yeah!"

Pretty Eyes

Today sitting in a Jiffy Lube waiting room....

O: "Mom! Look at that girl! She has pretty eyes!"

(the girl 'awed' and then told him thank you)

Cleaning

O: "Mom! We hate cleaning our room because we play too much!"

Such an Adult

O: "Mom, I want some more!" (cookies and chocolate milk)

M: "No, everybody gets one."

O: "MOM! Stop being such an adult!! Be a baby!!"

Swim Lesson

M: "Good job Odan!" (his swim instructor praising of him)

O: "Good job Mariah!" (smiling proudly while floating on his back)

Smart Power

O: "Guess what happens when we go into Heaven? Smart Power."

M: "You get 'smart' power?"

O: "Yep."

"Breaking the Girl"

Listening to 'Breaking the Girl' (RHCP)

O: "That guy said 'baking' the girl."

M: "I think he said 'breaking' the girl."

O: "Nope, he said 'baking' the girl." (pause) "That's evil."

A Present

O: "Mom, sometimes in my little class, Zachary be's naughty and tries to rip Tate."

M: "Rip him?"

O: "Yeah. It's because he thinks he's a present."

Sunday Morning

Odan comes in and wakes us up....

O: "Mom, is daddy here?"

M: "Yeah" (groggily)

Odan walks around the bed.

O: "Daddy!"

D: "Hi Odan!" (groggily)

O: "Are you dying?"

D: "No, just tired."

Bedtime Story

O: "You better hurry and tell us a story or we will turn maaaad."

Batman Socks & Batman Mask

O: "I want to wear my Batman socks and my Batman mask. My teacher won't believe it, I'm going to be so cool and so awesome!"

Lovely

(Odan trying to give his little sister a kiss)

D: "Noooo!" (whining)

O: "But DeeAnn, kisses are lovely!"

When I Die

O: "When I die, will I be a baby again?"

M: "No."

O: "I'm going to be a kid forever???"

Afraid

O: "Mom, I'm afraid of the world."

M: "The world?"

O: " Yeah. It's because there's earthquakes in it."

Mistakes

A conversation after fighting with his brother.

M: "Odan, are you angry?"

O: "No!" (his hands in his pockets, scowl on his face)

M: "Are you frustrated?"

O: "No! I'm just making mistakes!"

M: "What kind of mistakes?"

O: "Fighting mistakes."

Wives

O: "Everyone only has one wife...except the Hulk."

B: "Oh, how many wives does the Hulk have?"

O: "Um, a thousand or something - I don't know."

(B in this convesation is our nephew, Brian)

A Little Bit Sad

At Murray park....

O: "This is making me a little bit sad."

M: "Why?"

O: "Because the birds are gone."

Animal Power

O: "Mom, this is how animals get their power..."

(Proceeds to pound his fists on his chest like a gorilla)

Old

O: "Mom, are you old?"

M: "No!"

O: "Are you sure?"

Me looking at him questioningly...

O: "Are you sure??"

M: "Do you think I'm old?"

O: "Yeah"

It's True

This is a conversation we were having while we were driving....

K: "Mom, are we going to live forever?"

M: "Yes, but our bodies will die, and our spirits will keep living"

K & O: "Aww" (sadly)

M: "We will get them back again."

K & O: "How?"

M: "I'll tell you - because of Jesus, it's called Resurrection"

O: "Does that mean I will get a new mommy?"

M: "No, I get to be your mommy forever, and do you know why?"

O: "Why?"

M: "Because mommy and daddy were married in the Temple."

(Odan begins a whimpering-like, crying sound)

K: "Odan are you crying? Why are you crying?"

O: "Because it's true!"

K: "No it's not!"

O: "Yes it is! Mommy, is what you just said true?"

M: "Yes it is."

O: "See! I told ya!"

Spider

O: "I want to be a spider."

M: "Why?"

O: "Because I want to be a tough one that someone would smash and I won't die."

Target

Odan and I were at Target, and as we are going down the school supply aisle, Odan turns to a lady walking in the opposite direction as us and says, "Hi!" enthusiastically. She turns to him and says, "Helloooo!" as she passes by. Odan recoils and 2 seconds after she'd passed us he says to me, "Mommy, she sounds crazy!" I turn around to see if by chance she didn't hear him, and all I see is the lady turned around looking straight at me with her jaw dropped to the floor in offense at his comment.

I quickly turned to Odan and said, "She doesn't sound crazy!" To which he quickly replied, "Yes she does!"

I didn't turn back around.

Love

O: "If you love people, then somebody will be in your heart."

Beautiful Stranger

I was in the kitchen doing dishes and listening to Madonna's song, 'Beautiful Stranger' from the Austin Powers soundtrack. Odan was sitting at the table listening as well while he ate a snack.

O: "Beautiful stranger?" (laughs) "That's funny!" (But also a little bit confused)

Once the chorus came around again, he repeats,

O: "Beautiful stranger?" (laughing at the absurdity of the thought)

So I decide to explain.

Me: "Odan, your daddy was a stranger when I first met him."

O: "He was? Was he a good stranger?"

Me: "Yes, and I went up to him and said, 'Hi, I'm Norda, what's your name?' and he said, 'My name is Kendall.'"

O: "And then he changed into a daddy?"

Me: (laughing) "Yeah, something like that."

He then referred to his daddy as a beautiful stranger for a few days.

Fire Truck

Driving into the parking lot for swim lessons last night, we noticed a big yellow fire truck parked near the back of the lot.

O: "Mom! A fire truck! I think there's a man in a tree!" (Pause) "Or a fire."

Outside

This one was while Odan was at our friend's house. She was taking the kids out to play and talking about how beautiful it was outside. This was their conversation:

Miche: "Odan, what's your favorite thing about being outside? What is your favorite thing to do?"

O: "Eat."

Hey Mom

In Target today.....

O: "Hey mommy?"

M: "Yes Odan..."

O: "Um, I love you."

A passerby turned around and said to me, "wow, that just melted my heart, and I don't even know him!"

He says this spontaneously, seemingly out of the blue. And usually it is mostly when I need it. Love this boy.

Tiny Hulk

This morning Odan brought me one of the boys' little toy airplanes. I noticed that the end of one of the wings was bent, so I began to question Odan on what had happened to it. (I am unusually bugged whenever any of their toys break) I also happen to know that those particular little metal planes are the perfect 'key' to unlocking mommy and daddy's room, hence the probability it was used to try and open our door.

Me: "Odan, what happened to the wing?"

O: "I don't know."

Me: "It's bent...how did that happen?"

O: "Oh, I think a tiny Hulk bent it."

Me: "Really?"

O: "Yeah, a tiny Hulk bent it."

What's That Smell?

Driving home from Kaysville one night, after passing Bountiful (and the 'fire' from whatever plants those are just to the side of the freeway)

M: "Ew, what's that smell?" (jokingly)

O: "I think DeeAnn farted!"

D: "Nooo!" (a little angry at the accusation)

M: "No, it wasn't DeeAnn, it's the fire we just saw."

O: "Oh, I think the fire farted!"

The whole backseat erupts in laughter.

Headache

O: "Daddy, do you have a headache?"

D: "Yeah."

O: "Oh no! Then you're gonna die today!!" (said in a very loud voice)

Sticker

Last summer I took the kids to California, and only an hour into our drive (we were passing Provo) this was our conversation.

Me: "Hey you guys, look at the mountain! Do you see the 'Y'? See the 'Y' on the mountain?"

(After they finally spot it)

K: "Yeah!"

O: "Oh, yeah! Is that a sticker?"

Me: "What? Where?" (clearly not understanding what he is talking about?"

O: "On the mountain! Is the 'Y' a sticker?"

I'm Smart

O: "Hey, I'm smart!"

Stranger: "Oh you are? That is good!"

O: "Yeah, I'm smart because I ate fish. Fish helps your brain to be smart."

Snakes

O: "Hey mommy, snakes poop on you. It's because snakes think we are toilets."

Video Games

The boys were playing with a friend up in their room, and I was eavesdropping. :) The following is what I heard....

Jack: "Do you guys have any video games?"

K: "No, not yet."

J: "Are you trying to get some? How much money do you have?"

K: "I don't know."

O: "We have no moneys King!" (said in a strictly and clearly informative way.) "We have no moneys!"

Awesome.

When I grow up

K: "When I grow up, I'm going to go to work too!"

Me: "Yep, what job do you want to do, or what work do you want to go to?"

K: "I want to make teeth!"

O: "Yeah! And I want to make dollars!"

Robot Odan

"I. Am. A. Robot." (in monotone robot voice)

"Watch me change into a square" (begins making classic robot sounds as he systematically gets down on the floor with his body becoming a 'square')

Gotta Be Cool

"You gotta be cool, when I'm walkin' on Wall Street"

Thank you School House Rock....

"Buy low, so high, get a piece of the pie!"

Yes, he's been busting this out randomly now for about 3 weeks.

(Actual words to that song: 'You gotta be cool, when you're walkin on Wall Street...Buy low, sell high, take you're piece of the pie')

Toasty

Walking through the crosswalk to pick up King from Kindergarten today the crossing guard mentioned how "toasty" it is.

A few steps later Odan says to me:

"What does toasty mean? Oh- I think it means you will turn into toast. That would be a huge giant piece of toast!"

I love it when he asks a question and then answers it himself before I have a chance to explain things.

So I replied:

"Then I would eat you if you were a giant piece of toast!"

I guess that freaked him out because he protested pretty intensly:

"Noooo!!"

INXS

While I was doing dishes one day, Odan walked right up to me and said,

"Your moves are so raw, I've got to let you know."

Then turned around and walked out of the kitchen.

Ladies!

"Ladies! Ladies! Hiii! My name is Odan ladies!"

Odan yelled this out to a couple of 6 or 7 year old girls who were racing towards the playground he was on. He was 3 and a half at the time. They, in true girl fashion, ignored him.

Charlotte's Web

The boys were watching Charlotte's Web and during the scene when Charlotte is singing her last song to Wilbur, Odan calls to me,

O: "Mommy? Is Charlotte dying?"

I came over to watch the scene with him, in the hopes to ease the explanation of death.

M: "Yes, honey, she is."

O: "Why?"

M: "Because she's old."

O: "So when you get old a monster will eat you?"

Hulk

O: "I'm turning into the Hulk!" (scowl on his face)

M: "Oh, Odan, don't do that! Why are you turning into the Hulk?" (sympathetically)

O: "I need to! Because I'm angry!"

Tram

On the Tram up at Snowbird, midway through the ride....

Odan looking very serious, reserved even (which is very uncommon for Odan).

"Mommy? Is this going to change into a spaceship and fly us into space?"

He was anxious, excited, and worried all in one look, waiting for my answer.

My reply,

"No Odan, remember? It's taking us to the top of the mountain."

He smiled, relieved I think. Afterwards, I wish I would have thought to mess with him a little bit, and tell him we would take a trip to space. But, my first mothering instinct is to calmly inform. That's not always the most fun. :)